Welcome to my Newsletter 3/5/08

"Some think it's holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it's the letting go!"

~Sylvia Robinson~

Oh what a lesson today's quote holds! I can't tell you how many times I thought holding on would make me stronger, when in reality it was the letting go that helped me grow. I have learned that life is fluid--each moment a gift.

Your turn:

What have you been holding onto that is hurtful or weakens you? Most likely these are things that keep us from moving forward. Perhaps we are holding onto an unrequited love or an unrewarding friendship that prevents us from making new friends or finding more fulfilling love. Identify something that you need to let go of -- and then repeat today's quote while visualizing the letting go.

Your affirmation:

I let go of anything that hurts me. I welcome all things that encourage me.

Great Quotes from Great Leaders!

About 2 1/2 months ago, my friends at Simple Truths released a new book and inspirational movie titled: Great Quotes from Great Leaders. The response was overwhelmingly positive! Their first print run that was projected to last 90 days - sold out in a week!
Therefore, I wasn't able to share this powerful new movie with you. The photos, the music, and of course, the quotes are terrific! I know you will enjoy them as much as I have -
So turn up your speakers and enjoy 3 minutes of inspiration. Just click the link below.
http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?t=lwylckcab.0.0.ce6gcpbab.0&ts=S0322&p=http%3A%2F%2Fmk1.netatlantic.com%2Ft%2F3853348%2F19262524%2F10970%2F0%2F%3Fu%3DaHR0cDovL3d3dy5HcmVhdHF1b3Rlc2Zyb21ncmVhdGxlYWRlcnMuY29tP01JQU1TUkM9VzA4MDIyNy8%253d%26x%3D6ddbb3a8&id=preview


Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you' to Jackie Davis from Richmond, VA for sharing Anthony Robbin's Summer Challenge with my Readers!



To sign up for Anthony Robbin's Summer Challenge, visit: http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?t=lwylckcab.0.0.ce6gcpbab.0&ts=S0322&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tonyrobbins.com%2FShapeUp%2Fsignup.html&id=preview

Life Improvement Tips

Ten Tips to Achieving Your Goals

In achieving any worthy objective, there must be consistency in the amount of hard work you put in; a day here and there just isn't going to do it. A week of sustained effort isn't going to do it either! So what am I saying? I'm saying if you want to achieve your goals, you must remain focused on exactly what it is you want. Starting the process is usually quite easy, especially when you have that initial excitement about a new objective or goal you've just set for yourself. Here are ten ideas to assist you in reaching any goal you care to set:

1) The Right Reasons (personal to you). Doing things for the right reasons is easy; having strong, powerful emotions for reaching your goals will give you the "Get Up and Go" that is needed when things sometimes get tough. If we're excited and full of enthusiasm for reaching our goals, then the energy and vigor naturally follow. If you don't have a strong enough reason for doing something, then it becomes more of an effort, requires more discipline, and uses more energy.

2) Think In Ink. Use pen and paper to write down clear, concise goals. When your eyes see your goals written down, it becomes a new permanent picture in your subconscious mind for you to recall any time you choose.

3) See It, Be It. Visualize what it is you want; feel the strong emotions you associate with your goals -- the smells, the tastes, the happiness, the sense of achievement.

4) Say It Loud, Say It Proud. Speak to yourself in positive, present-tense terms. I am, I have, I earn, I do, I can. The more emotion you put into this exercise, the more powerful they become, and the more energy you will feel.

5) Destination, Station. You can't travel in the right direction unless you know where to start and exactly where you want to end up. Your route can change in many ways; the journey will almost certainly not be a straight one, so look ahead for the blind corners before you get to them.

6) Measure Your Treasure. Your goals are something to be treasured; if they're not, then you probably don't have "The Right Reasons" in the first place. So measure your progress. You can only adjust your route if you find out where you are; otherwise you will waste a lot of effort to end up a long way from your intended destination.

7) Peer, Steer. Associate with as many positive, motivated, and focused individuals or groups as you can. Meet with them, talk on the phone, in email, or by fax, or join news groups. Set up your own newsgroups if you can't find any on your particular goal.

8) Fewer Goals, Fewer Tolls. By this I mean you should concentrate your efforts on just a few goals at any one time. You can have as many goals as you like, but only have a few priority goals to work on at any point. Don't pay a higher price en route.

9) Pay Every Day. If you have "The Right Reasons," you already have a powerful driving force to motivate you to do something every single day to move toward your desired goals. Taking action every day means you can break down your BIG goals into small manageable-sized pieces. You wouldn't try to eat a whole week's groceries in one meal. So why bite off more than you can chew?

10) Celebrate and Congratulate. When you achieve milestones, reward yourself and celebrate, even if only in a small way. You're on the road to overall success, so congratulate yourself on your achievement. The more you do this, the better you will feel; the better you feel, the more likely you are to do it all over again.



Career Tips 101

Career Audit Part 5

Do you have a strategic career plan? Do you know where you want to be one year from now? How about 3, 5 and 10 years from now? Now is a great time of year to conduct a "career audit." A career audit is your opportunity to assess how your professional life is going. It allows you to identify what is going well and areas in which you'd like to adjust.

Keep your "more and less" list in a prominent place where you will see it often. Review it each week as you plan the coming week so you can schedule time to focus on these priority goals. (You do strategically plan your weeks in advance, don't you? If not, I recommend putting this helpful habit into practice in 2008.)

Use your career audit to actively manage your career and reach both your short and long-term professional goals. Take the time now to strategically design the rest of your careerso you can truly actualize these wise words from Confucius:

"Find work that you love and never work another day in your life."

Relationships 101

17 Ways to Make Your Relationships Great in 2008

I recently saw a list of the 5 top topics that people create goals around for the new year, with weight loss leading the list.What struck me as odd was that creating better relationships wasn't on that list!In my opinion, there is NOTHING more important than your relationships AND -The reason I hold this opinion isn't because I am a relationship coach who writes about, speaks about, coaches and teaches people like you about creating closer and more connected relationships. You see, everything we do or try to do in life is either about, includes or requires the help of a relationship of some kind. If you are a parent (or have parents) that's a relationship. If you work anywhere, you must develop relationships to be successful in your job.Governments must form relationships with other government organizations in order to be effective and even to be in harmony with one another. Even something like an engine in a car must have a "relationship" with the other parts of the car in order to work effectively and efficiently to provide transportation for the owner and passengers of the car. In my way of looking at things, if you're going to have something, why not go for the best?When it comes to your relationships, if you want them to be better than what you have right now, one of the best ways is to continually find some ways of improving them--and that starts with intentions and then setting and achieving some goals. In case you haven't written your goals or resolutions for 2008 (or even if you never do it), I want to offer you a few ideas about how you can create growing, more loving, more deeply connected relationships in the new year.Here are a few ways that have worked for me to keep my relationship close, connected and growing--and I offer them to you.

1. Forget about it.

Forget about what happened last year. It's done. It's over. If you feel like you need resolution about something that was said or that happened, talk to the other person. If you don't get the resolution that you want, don't carry it into the new year. Forgive yourself or the other person.Does that mean you allow yourself to be used or abused in any way. Of course not!All we are saying is that unresolved grievances may hurt you more than the other person--or more than you realize.

2. Set some relationship goals.

Think about what you'd like more of in 2008 in your relationship. We suggest that you take some time together and talk about what you want and some ways that you could practice that would bring you closer to having it--if the relationship is important to you.For instance, one of our relationship goals for 2008 might be "having more fun together." One of the ways we could "practice" is to keep a list of what "having fun" means to each of us and then doing one or more of those things every week.

3. Increase the amount of time you spend in bed--both sleeping and making love.

Statistics show that most of us don't get enough sleep--and relationships can certainly suffer if you don't. If you aren't sleeping, begin some type of meditation or relaxation program. There are plenty of resources out there that can help.If you are with an intimate partner, we suggest that you spend more time making love--from a connected space. If you don't feel connected, make it a practice to feel close and connected before love making. Talk about how the two of you can increase intimate feelings in your relationship.

4. Make your relationships a bigger priority.

Most of us lead very busy lives and we tend to put most everything ahead of maintaining and growing our relationships, especially the intimate one.I've said this many, many times but the idea bears repeating. People can very easily get "lost" from one another if they don't keep coming back to revitalizing their relationship.Committing to doing one simple thing like having a meal together once a day--or even one day a week--and talking together can make a big difference in a relationship.

5. Do something different.

Doing something different and varying from your routine helps you to expand and grow. Doing something different--something that excites both of you-can help your relationship to come alive.Some friends of mine went salsa dancing on New Year's Eve. This is the first time in a long while that they had celebrated this holiday away from home--so it was very different for them. They told us that although they were terrible at salsa dancing, they laughed and had a lot of fun.I suggest that you try something different that would be nourishing for your relationship.

Next week, I'll give you a few more of our 17 ways to help you create great relationships and what you want more of in 2008.

Quote of the Week

"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing."

~ George Bernard Shaw, 1856-1950, Irish Playwright and Nobel Prize Winner

Welcome to my Newsletter 2/27/08

"Grab a chance and you won't be sorry for a might-have-been."
~A. Ransome, Writer and Novelist~

If only "should haves" and "could haves" were franchises -- how rich many of us would be! How many times have you looked back and thought - "If only - " or "I wish I had -" Here's the good news - you have the power to eliminate the need for the majority of "should haves" ad "could haves" from your life by seizing the changes that come your way. Make sure you have your 3 Daily Action Items listed today and that they align with the goals you identified in your Before Snapshot of the Change Your Life Challenge. Now take a chance today and move forward toward your priorities. You would be amazed at what a difference one day can make. Practice this daily, and you will be astounded at the results.

Your turn:

Make sure you have created your 3 Daily Action Item List for the day. Then make sure these 3 Daily Action Items align with your most important personal goals. Commit to crossing off each item today.

Your affirmation:

Each day, I am guided by my priorities. I live in the present, moving toward my goals.

Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you!' to my friend Sonja Boehm from Switzerland for sending me the following video clip to share with my Readers.

When I watched this video clip, I thought about all the people that have so many gifts but always find excuses why they can't succeed.

If you have gifts and dreams that you didn't integrate into your life until now, watch this clip, and your life will change forever!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LnLVRQCjh8c



Life Improvement Tips

Creating Healthy Boundaries (Part 4 - End)


This week I will share 4 steps to help you create healthy boundaries.

Know yourself. Self-awareness is key to healthy boundaries. You need to know what you like and dislike - emotionally, physically, and spiritually. It is important to spend time assessing how you want to be treated. It is important to understand that you have a right to your own opinions and beliefs. You have a right to decide how you want to be touched and by whom.

Visualize your boundaries - You can use imagery to establish your boundaries. Imagine a bubble of light surrounding you completely. Imagine this bubble of light as your boundary. It helps keep you separate from others and protects you from unwanted intrusions. This bubble is very strong, yet it is semi-permeable. It will allow in the things and people that you choose and keep out anything harmful. Imagine this bubble surrounding you at all times. In your mind's eye picture someone yelling at you and you see their words bouncing right off your bubble. Now, imagine someone giving you a compliment and see their words passing right through the bubble into your heart.

Communicate your boundaries - It is your responsibility to let others know what your boundaries are. If someone crosses a line and violates a boundary of yours, you need to let them know. You need to be able to assert yourself and take care of your needs. You can't expect others to automatically know what your boundaries are. You are unique and have unique boundaries. It is important to be assertive and clear when you communicate your boundaries.
In the examples above, Jane could say to her boss, "I am not comfortable with you sharing this information with me. I would prefer if we stick to business." Harry could say to Frank, "I feel angry that you shared my private information with Joe. Please do not do that again." Rose could gently remove Bob's hand and say, "That feels uncomfortable, please do not touch me like that."

Enforce your boundaries. To claim your personal power and maintain your integrity, you need to be willing to protect yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. If you express your boundaries and someone still violates them, it is your responsibility to issue consequences. You need to enforce your boundaries and be willing to take appropriate action even when a small violation has occurred.

If you do not enforce your boundaries, you give the message that it is ok to let someone violate your boundaries. If a person crosses a boundary and you do not let them know, they are likely to repeat the offense. In fact, their behavior and boundary violations may escalate. If you allow this to continue it then becomes more and more difficult to correct this issue.

The bottom line is that it is your responsibility to know and protect your boundaries.

Boundaries are not meant to keep people away from you. They are necessary so that you can develop healthy relationships. Boundaries are meant to preserve your health, safety, and integrity. The key is to develop strong, but flexible boundaries. Boundaries are driven by context - you area able to adjust your boundaries depending on the situation. When you learn to create and enforce healthy boundaries you are claiming your personal power and taking responsibility for your life..

~ Kirsten ~




Career Tips 101

Career Audit Part 4

Do you have a strategic career plan? Do you know where you want to be one year from now? How about 3, 5 and 10 years from now? Now is a great time of year to conduct a "career audit." A career audit is your opportunity to assess how your professional life is going. It allows you to identify what is going well and areas in which you'd like to adjust.
Decide what you want more of in your career. Then rank each item in order of importance and create a specific action plan on how you will achieve each one. Use this plan to develop your career strategy for the year.



Relationships 101

For Singles (Part 4 - End)

Continuing on the topic of Five Key Questions For Creating Your 2008 Attraction Plan for Dating, today we're discussing the last set of relationship questions, which include:
What one or two things will you try that you haven't yet tried in order to meet new people to date?

For instance, if you are not athletic, then I don't recommend you going to a sports-oriented groups. You may feel awkward there.

Who can you enlist to help you in your search for a life partner?

There is a whole list of people who can help you: friends, family, co-workers, leaders at your synagogue or church. Also, there are match-makers who help people find life partners for a fee.

It's also a known fact that married women love to fix people up. So who can you approach about setting you up on a date?

Bonus question: What will you commit to doing differently in 2008 that you haven't done this past year?

Do you need to change your attitude about dating from an uptight perspective to a more relaxed one? Are you willing to be more open and positive about dating? All this will make you more attractive to the opposite sex.

Perhaps you need to learn how to weed through suitors better and more quickly. And, how is your rejection tolerance? Are you willing to face your fears head on and be fearless about meeting new people to date this year? Last, give someone a second chance or a second date. You may be pleasantly surprised what's really there.

My hope is that these relationship questions and dating advice for women and men have pushed you to think outside your box about dating, causing you to consider trying out a new approach or new ways to meet people.

When you take yourself outside your comfort zone and stay true to yourself, you will attract the right person to you!

Books by Helena Nyman:
To order 'Dating Miss Right', visit: http://www.lulu.com/content/1205744
To order 'Dating Mr. Right',visit: http://www.lulu.com/content/1104761

Welcome to my Newsletter 2/20/08

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world."

~Anne Frank~

The fact that you reading this shows your commitment to improve your surroundings and improve the world around you. The best part about changing our lives, and the world for the better is that we don't have to wait until tomorrow to start. Today - many opportunities will come your way to make a difference.Will you seize them and take the opportunity to reach out to someone? To make someone smile or laugh instead of shrugging your shoulders? The magic of living is right here, right now. Seize the day.

Your turn:

Remind yourself constantly today to "make a difference." Keep a smile on your face; truly listen instead of just nodding your head; make eye contact--connect.

***

Your affirmation:

Today I seize every opportunity to improve my world

Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you!' to my friend Jackie Davis who wanted to share the following Quote with my Readers!

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will.
You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

***

Life Improvement Tips

Creating Healthy Boundaries (Part 3)

Internal boundaries are a little more difficult to grasp, but they are every bit as important as physical boundaries. Internal boundaries help you distinguish yourself as a unique individual with unique thoughts, feelings, needs, and desires. Your internal boundaries set the tone for how others treat you.

If your internal boundaries are too permeable or too weak you will have a hard time distinguishing your needs and desires from other's needs and desires. You may feel responsible for other people's feelings and believe that they are responsible for your feelings. Relationships can then become enmeshed. Enmeshment is when a person in a relationship feels the need to think and feel the same way as the other person and thus, loses their unique identity.
Internal boundaries that are too rigid create great distance in relationships and interfere with intimacy. If you have rigid internal boundaries you likely have trouble getting close to anyone and may shut out those around you. You may appear cold and distant.

Healthy internal boundaries require that you take responsibility for your emotions, thoughts, and attitudes. You are not responsible for anyone else's feelings and they are not responsible for yours. If you have healthy boundaries, you know yourself well enough to understand your feelings, needs, desires, and emotions. You ask for what you need and defend yourself against those who attempt to violate your boundaries. You know how you want to be treated and you communicate that to others. You can adjust your boundaries based on the situation and what is right for you.

Now that you have a better understanding of external and internal boundaries, next week I will share 4 steps to help you create healthy boundaries.

~ Kirsten ~

***

Career Tips

Career Audit Part 3

Do you have a strategic career plan? Do you know where you want to be one year from now? How about 3, 5 and 10 years from now? Now is a great time of year to conduct a "career audit." A career audit is your opportunity to assess how your professional life is going. It allows you to identify what is going well and areas in which you'd like to adjustcourse.

Schedule a few minutes in your calendar to brainstorm what you desire more and less of in your professional life. You could do this during your commute time, while at the gym, etc. Do not judge what you write, even if you think it's off the wall. Let your brainstormed ideas sit for a few days. Return to them with a fresh perspective and complete your list.

***

Relationships 101

For Singles (Part 3)

As we continue to discuss 5 Key Questions for Creating Your 2008 Attraction Plan for Dating, today, we'll find out about an important time-saving tip. Below is yet another relationship question to ask yourself when strategically creating your 2008 Attraction Plan for Dating:
What would support you in achieving your dating and relationship goals for 2008?

For instance, would losing weight or having a makeover support you in feeling better about yourself so you would be more confident about going out and dating? Perhaps better time management would give you more time in your day to look for someone and for going out on dates. Taking up a new sport can put you in touch with new people to date. Last, by working with a relationship coach or a therapist, you can get the support and encouragement you may need from an impartial person to take action.

***

Quote of the Week

"You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you."

~ James Allen ~

Welcome to my Newsletter 2/13/08

"Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."

~ Antoine de Saint-Exupery ~

I often tell the significant others in my life - family and friends that I love them more today than yesterday and less than I shall tomorrow. I do not remember where I found that quote but for me it is an affirmation that my love will continue to grow, develop and expand each day. I thought that was so beautifully articulated. And what is Valentine's Day? It is a time when we articulate our feelings toward our loved ones. Often it is done through browsing for the perfect card, but why not take a moment today and write a special handwritten note? Then take it a step further and make an effort to verbally express and affirm your love!

Your Turn:

How often do you say "I love you," to those you love? Do the words roll off your tongue in routine, or are they said with heartfelt meaning? Think of ways you can articulate and share your feelings for those you love. Take a moment today to write a handwritten note and express your love to someone.

Your affirmation:

I express my love for others easily and often!


Valentine's Day Special


Watch this beautiful Movie!
A special 'Thank you' to my Colleague Mary Robinson for sharing this beautiful movie with us!

To watch the movie, visit:

http://rs6.net/tn.jsp?t=nmywcjcab.0.0.ce6gcpbab.0&ts=S0313&p=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youarelovemovie.com%2F&id=preview



It's all about giving!

A special 'Thank you!' to Marie Kellow for sharing this story with us!

Little Stuart was a shy, little boy. One day he came home and told his mother that he wanted to make a Valentine for everyone in his class. Her heart sank. She thought, "I wish he wouldn't do that," because she had watched the children when they walked home from school. Her Stuart was always behind them. They laughed and hung on to each other and talked to each other. But Stuart was never included. Nevertheless, she decided she would go along with her son. So she purchased the paper and glue and crayons. For three weeks, night after night, Stuart painstakingly made 35 Valentines.
Valentine's Day dawned, and Stuart was beside himself with excitement. He carefully stacked them up, put them in a bag, and bolted out the door. His mother decided to bake him his favorite cookies and serve them nice and warm with a cool glass of milk when he came home from school. She just knew he would be disappointed and maybe that would ease the pain a little. It hurt her to think that he wouldn't get many Valentines - maybe none at all.
That afternoon she had the cookies and milk on the table. When she heard the children outside, she looked out the window. Sure enough, there they came, laughing and having the best time. And, as always, there was Stuart in the rear. He walked a little faster than usual. She fully expected him to burst into tears as soon as he got inside. His arms were empty, she noticed, and when the door opened she choked back the tears.
"Mommy has some cookies and milk for you," she said.
But he hardly heard her words. He just marched right on by, his face aglow, and all he could say was: "Not a one. Not a one."
Her heart sank.
And then he added, "I didn't forget a one, not a single one!"
This is Rex Barker reminding us to see the inner joy of a child giving something and to understand that true joy comes from giving and helping others, not by receiving.

Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you!' to my friend Soja Boehm from Switzerland for sharing this unique story about the Friendship between a Crow and a Kitten.

To watch the video, click on the following link:

http://www.animalsspeak.org/viewtopic.php?t=257

Life Improvement Tips

Creating Healthy Boundaries (Part 2)

External boundaries are your physical limits. They help you protect your physical space and your body. Your external boundaries dictate how close you let others get to you, as well as, how you want to be touched and by whom. While external boundaries are not tangible, most people are aware of their physical boundaries when someone gets too close to them. Think back to a time when you were talking to someone who kept moving in closer and closer to you. At what point did you begin to feel uncomfortable? That is when your physical boundary was violated.
External boundaries also include the limits you set for your possessions. You may allow a close friend to borrow your car, but if a stranger asked to borrow your car you would say no. You have the right to set limits on who gets to use your belongings and how they are used.
Weak external boundaries make it difficult to understand where your physical space ends and another's begins. You may believe that others have the right to touch you anytime and in any way. Weak external boundaries may lead you to believe that what is yours is also everyone else's.

Rigid external boundaries prevent you from getting physically close to anyone. You may feel uncomfortable hugging or touching anyone, including your family. Rigid external boundaries can help keep out unwanted and harmful physical contact; unfortunately, you also miss out on the pleasure of healthy contact.

Healthy external boundaries are durable yet yielding. You control the space that you need. You adjust your boundaries as needed; letting friends and family in closer than strangers. When you have healthy external boundaries you understand that it is always your right to choose how, when, and by whom you will be touched. You will defend your space and your body if someone violates your boundaries. You also understand that you have the right to decide who can use your possessions and how they will be used.
Next week we will look at internal boundaries.
Create a great week!

Career Tips

Career Audit Part 2

Do you have a strategic career plan? Do you know where you want to be one year from now? How about 3, 5 and 10 years from now? Now is a great time of year to conduct a "career audit." A career audit is your opportunity to assess how your professional life is going. It allows you to identify what is going well and areas in which you'd like to adjustcourse.
To the next step in your career audit is to decide what elements of your career could be improved and what you'd like to change.

Specifically, write down the following:

Three things you want *more* of in your current your job- and -Three things you want *less* of in your current your job

For example:

In your current job, you may want more:
* Challenging assignments* Feedback from your boss* Time off
On the flip side, you may want less:
* Conflict with a certain person* Miscommunication within your team* Overtime and late hours

Feel free to add more things at any time and get clear what YOU REALLY WANT!

Relationships 101

For Singles (Part 2)

Continuing our Five Questions For Creating Your 2008 Attraction Plan for Dating, our next question is:
What are your dating or relationship goals for 2008? (3 months/ 6 months/ 1 year)
Goals need to be written down to make them attainable. I suggest you post your goals at a place you see at least once a day. I post my goals on the bathroom mirror. For instance, an example of goals written down is "in 3 months time I will be dating someone steadily, lose 10 pounds, and work as a volunteer once a month". As a relationship coach, some of my clients have told me they put their goals on their computer- or in their Blackberry.
Until the next time, when we'll continue our discussion on the Five Key Questions for Creating Your 2008 Attraction Plan for Dating.

New!!! New!!! New!!!
Cupid Newsletter for Singles

Articles * Singles Events * Stories, etc

To sign up, send a blank e-mail to:
nyman@consultant.com and write "Cupid" in the Subject Line!

Valentine's Day would not be complete without Cupid, the most recognized symbol of love. Nope, we are not talking about one of Santa's reindeer. We are speaking of Cupid, the God of Love. It is said that if Cupid shoots his arrow of love and hits you, that you will fall helplessly and madly in love with the next person you meet.
In Roman mythology, Cupid is the son of Venus, the goddess of love. In greek mythology, he was known as Eros and was the son of Aphrodite.
According to Roman mythology, Cupid fell madly in love with Psyche despite his mothers jealousy over Psyche's beauty. While he married her, he also told her never to look at him. He visited her only at night. Her sisters convinced her to look at Cupid despite his warning. So she lit a lamp one night so she could see him. Cupid then left her.
Psyche wandered aimlessly for a time, searching in vain for Cupid. She happened upon the temple of Venus. Venus, looking to destroy her, gave Psyche a series of perilous tasks, each one more difficult and previous than than preceding one. Her final task was to deliver take a little box to the underworld and get some of the beauty of Proserpine. She was warned not to open the box. But again, curiosity overcame her and she opened the box. There was nothing in the box but deadly slumber. (Don't despair, this story has a happy ending!)
Cupid, who really loved Psyche all the while, came upon her lifeless body. He forgave Psyche and swept the deadly slumber back into the box. The gods then made Psyche a goddess.
At this point it is appropriate to say "and they all lived happily ever after". Oh, by the way, if he hits you with one of his arrows, you too will live happily ever after!
Note: There are many versions of the story of Cupid and Psyche. The basic theme is the same, but details of the myth vary.
Did you know? Cupid is sometimes shown blindfolded. Why?...Because love is blind!

Quote of the Week

"The only limit to your impact is your imagination and commitment."

~ Anthony Robbins ~

Welcome to my Newsletter 2/6/08

"Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstances."

~ Bruce Barton (American Congressman, 1886-1967) ~

As you read today's quote what comes to mind? Do you have a strong belief in yourself? For many of us, the answer might be "no." Perhaps we have tried and failed one too many times--and our self-belief waivers. Perhaps we too often compare ourselves to others and instead of recognizing our unique value - we see only the missing pieces.

Here is the good news: That is your choice. And if that is your choice, then you have the ability to choose otherwise. Okay, so perhaps it sounds simpler than it is, but you are well on your way because this is the 3rd day you have opened your Good Morning e-mail.

The most effective way to develop self-belief (or self-confidence) is through taking action steps that demonstrate we are worthwhile. Reading this Good Morning and writing the affirmation (you are writing them, right?) is one great example.




Your Turn:


Make a list of 10 things that are wonderful about you. Keep this in a place you will see it often. Add to it regularly. (Side note: I don't create these exercise for fun - I have created them because they work. Are you working them?)

Your affirmation:



I am a wonderful person filled with one-of-a-kind
value, worth and love.

Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you!' to my friend Soja Boehm from Switzerland for sharing this unique story about the Friendship between a Crow and a Kitten.

To watch the video, click on the following link:

http://www.animalsspeak.org/viewtopic.php?t=257

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Life Improvement Tips

Creating Healthy Boundaries (Part I)



Healthy personal boundaries are essential to healthy relationships. Unfortunately, many people have trouble establishing and maintaining appropriate boundaries. This month we will explore boundaries.

Jane started a new job recently. She likes her co-workers and her job, but she is not sure about her boss. Pete, her new boss, has been gossiping about all of the people in the company. Pete has given her the rundown on all the co-workers including how his personal opinions about each one. He has even asked for Jane's advice on how to deal with one of Jane's co-workers. Jane feels very uncomfortable with Pete and she is not sure what to do.

Harry shared private information about his marital problems with Frank in confidence. Frank later shared this information with Joe. Joe asks Harry how he is doing with his marital difficulties. Harry is mad and feels betrayed.

Rose had a colleague, Bob, who occasionally put his hands on her shoulders when he was in her office. Rose felt uncomfortable with Bob's touch.

What do these stories have in common? All of them involve boundary violations. Pete was sharing inappropriate information with a supervisee. If Pete needs to discuss how to handle an employee, then he should seek out someone who is at the same level in the organization as he is. Frank violated a boundary by sharing private information with Joe. Bob violated Rose's boundaries by touching her without permission.

What are boundaries? Boundaries are what separate you from others. Boundaries provide emotional and physical space between you and others. They are the limits you set for how you want to be treated. They are invisible lines that you draw to define yourself and your space. Healthy boundaries help keep you safe, allow you to create intimate relationships, and promote integrity. You have both external and internal boundaries.

Next week we will explore external boundaries.

Create a great week!


~ Kirsten ~



Career Tips


Your Career Audit (Part One)



Do you have a strategic career plan? Do you know where you want to be one year from now? How about 3, 5 and 10 years from now? Now is a great time of year to conduct a "career audit." A career audit is your opportunity to assess how your professional life is going. It allows you to identify what is going well and areas in which you'd like to adjust course.

To begin your career audit, carefully assess your current job. This includes pinpointing what is going well and what you'd like to be even better. For the things that are going well, take time to pat yourself on the back for your successes. Write them out and keep them close at hand in your success file. (Keeping your accomplishments on file will help when it comes time for your annual review.)


~ Maret ~



Relationships 101

For Singles (Part 1)




5 Key Questions for Creating Your 2008 Attraction Plan for Dating

It's time for a new beginning, turning over a new leaf, and for renewing our hope of finding love this year. Now is the time to think about how you want 2008 to be for you. You get to create what you feel is possible for you. Here are some relationship questions and suggestions from your relationship coach to get you thinking about what you want to attract into your life this year.

How would you envision your life to look in January 2008, a year from now? What values and characteristics do you want your romantic partner to have?

Here, I am asking you to close your eyes and see your life a year from now. If you see it, then you can work toward your vision. Once you have visualized what you want, it's important to make it real by creating a picture of it or putting together a collage of what you want your life to look like and what qualities you want your romantic partner to embody.

For instance, when I was single, I made a picture (a very primitive one!) of a male and female stick figure dancing. This is my representation of what my boyfriend (eventual husband) and I would be doing. It turns out even though my husband didn't really dance, he was willing to learn! So my vision did turn into reality after all.

Next week, we'll continue our Key Questions For Creating Your 2008 Attraction Plan For Dating.

*

Quote of the Week

"What you must dare is to be yourself."

~ Dag Hammarskjold ~

Welcome to my Newsletter 1/30/08

"What a beautiful name, {Insert Your Name Here}. {Insert Your Name Here}, you are fabulous. {Insert Your Name Here}, you are one of the most creative, talented people we know. {Insert Your Name Here}, lots of people love you. You are smart, beautiful and intelligent, {Insert Your Name Here}. {Insert Your Name Here}, we enjoy working with you."


How did it feel to start your day by reading that paragraph with your name in it? I found I had a smile on my face! Starting our day with affirmations and positive statements puts us in a positive mindset for the day ahead Recently I met with a group of women in Orlando. We were discussing how important the Good Morning service is to them and how they rely on it for a positive start. We were also discussing what to do with all of our favorite quotes. A few ideas I wanted to share:

1. Type up your favorite quotes or write them neatly. Take them to a copy shop and have them laminated or purchase self-laminating paper at an office store. Read through them each morning to get your day off to a great start. Pick on to carry with you daily.2. Consider putting your favorite quotes as wallpaper on your computer or a screen show so they change regularly throughout the day.

Your Turn:

Are you regularly using positive affirmations that "speak" to you? Start a quote collection to inspire and encourage you.

Your affirmation:

I take time to nurture and encourage myself with positive words.

A special 'Thank you!' to my wonderful friend Janet Starkey who wanted to share this beautiful movie with my Readers!


To view the movie, visit:

http://www.blessyoumovie.com/

Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you!' to my wonderful friend Jackie Davis from Richmond, VA for this inspirational story!


You Have Two Choices


Jerry is the manager of a restaurant. He is always in a good mood. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would always reply: "If I were any better, I would be twins!" Many of the waiters at his restaurant quit their jobs when he changed jobs so they could follow him around from restaurant to restaurant. Why? Because Jerry was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day Jerry was always there telling him how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him. "I don't get it!" No one can be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Jerry replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, I have two choices today. I can choose to be in a good mood or I can choose to be in a bad mood. I always choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens I can choose to be victim or can choose to learn from it. I always choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I always choose the positive side of life." "But it's not always that easy," I protested. "Yes it is," Jerry said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. It's your choice how you live your life."

Several years later, I heard that Jerry accidentally did something you are never supposed to do in the restaurant business. He left the back door of his restaurant open and then in the morning, he was robbed by three armed men. While Jerry was trying to open the safe box, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found quickly and rushed to the hospital. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Want to see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place. "The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door, "Jerry replied. "Then, after they shot me, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or could choose to die. I chose to live." "Weren't you scared" I asked. Jerry continued, "The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the emergency room I saw the expression on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read "he's a dead man." I knew I needed to take action." "What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big nurse shouting questions at me," said Jerry. "She asked if I was allergic to anything." "Yes, to bullets" I replied. Over their laughter I told them: I am choosing to live. Please operate on me as if I am alive, not dead." Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day you have the choice to either enjoy your life or to hate it. The only thing that is truly yours - that no one can control or take from you - is your attitude. So if you can take care of that, everything else in life becomes much easier.

Life Improvement Tips

4 People To Avoid - Is It You?

Outrageous lifestyles of the very successful are envied by most of the world. Are you part of the envied? Or are you part of the envying? If you are living a successful life by your own standards, congratulations. If you haven't quite reached that level yet, then this article is for you. There are several characteristics that those who practice successful living possess. The characteristics listed below are NOT any of them. In fact, they are the opposite. See if you possess these characteristics and, if you do, my advice to you is - change.

The Dreadful Dud

The dreadful dud is the person who answers questions with one word. Any time there is anyone who wants to initiate a conversation with the Dreadful Dud, the conversation is dead before it gets started. These people are not mean or necessarily rude. They just don't believe they have much to contribute, so they cut it short as much as possible. Consequently, the conversations become fewer and fewer.
Eventually, the Dreadful Dud gets the reputation of the dull guy or girl. Or you might say he or she is a dud. Don't be a dud. Practice your natural personality. Did you know that you were created to enjoy life? Did you know that life is meant to be tasted? There are juices inside to be experienced. When was the last time you took a chance? Live life as it's something to be loved. Practice makes perfect. Practice passion. Practice charisma. It's who you really are.

The Social Soloist

The Social Soloist is the person who never begins to live and love life. This person finds him/herself at home, alone, on the couch, every night, watching silly reality programs. The Social Soloist finds purpose in who is going to have to eat the next set of buffalo testicles or who is going to be kicked off an island.
The irony of the whole thing is the Social Soloist is at home experiencing nothing while he/she watches those who are actually living and loving life. Does that make sense? Instead of trying to escape through the boob tube, get out and meet people. If you must start small, invite some people over to watch a decent movie. Eventually, it will develop into a social fun time and, who knows, it just may move out of the TV room.

The Pitiful Procrastinator

Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow. Ever hear that one? How ridiculous! Have you ever known anyone that lived by this motto? How frustrating! The Pitiful Procrastinator always finds him/herself stressed out and behind in life. Why? They keep putting it off! Everything is always put off until later. Nothing is ever done in time. And when it eventually gets done, it's shoddy and half-way completed. They just want to hurry up and get over with - whatever "it" is.
Laundry. Homework. Dishes. Meetings. Confrontation. Putting gas in the car. Changing Careers. You name it, it never gets done when it needs to get done. Life will pass the Pitiful Procrastinator by. And when it's too late to make up his/her mind, regret will take hold. Do not let regret arise and dominate your mind. Instead, take control of your mind right now. Make a freakin list and stick by it! Don't fall prey to the practice of the Pitiful Procrastinator. Remember, practice makes perfect.

The Unknown Optimist

These people have such positive energy they could suck the life out of the room if they were to make a phone call during a New Years Eve party. While everyone is having such a good time, making plans and looking forward to the future, the unknown optimist looks to the dark side. The unknown optimist looks to the dark side of everything. If you were to tell this person that he just one $1,000.000.00, he would say something like, "Great! Now I'm going to be in a higher tax bracket and have to pay more taxes."
The unknown optimist lives in a vacuum that you do not want to live in. It's the "everything sucks" vacuum. Take inventory of your overall attitude. Don't take the extreme opposite route either. If you go to the opposite extreme, you'll find yourself on the Pollyanna platform. A great place to be is in the realistic but optimistic middle. While you're there, be sure to live and love life.

~ Jeff ~

Relationships 101

Recognizing Unhealthy Relationships

One of the keys to obtaining a better life or living arrangement is to assess the quality of relationships that you surround yourself with. Do you surround yourself with loving relationships or unhealthy relationships? For someone that has a pattern or history with unhealthy relationships, the difference between the two may be difficult to decipher.
Healthy relationships are relationships that add to our well being, not subtract. They bring out the best of us by being supportive of our goals and our inner selves. Unhealthy relationships often cause us stress and subtract from our well being, often leaving us feeling depleted of energy.

Common symptoms of unhealthy relationships include sickness, stress, and a negative outlook of ourselves and our world around us. People who are accustomed to unhealthy relationships often stay cornered in situations like this because they do not recognize that there is another way of living. They might continue the unhealthy relationship indefinitely and never seek a better way of life for themselves or they may leave the unhealthy relationship, but not the pattern.
The life pattern is essentially the root of the problem. The pattern may have stemmed from family upbringing or any other form of influential relationship. The key is to recognize the behavior and identify where it is coming from.

A creative way to assess your patterns is to write it down. Take out a notebook that you know you will keep for years to come. Write down all the major relationships that you have had in your life. Your earliest form of relationship more than likely was a family member or someone acting in this form. Note how they showed you love. Then note how you reciprocated that love. Continue in a chronological order with any additional relationships you have had, i.e. friends, personal and love relationships.

Next make a column on your right hand side. Re-read your assessments in order, as you read through them determine whether they were healthy or unhealthy and mark it down in your right hand column. Having an overview of your relationships right before your eyes makes it easier to look at. You may actually bring issues to attention that you were not aware of before. For some this may even be a rather emotional exercise, but be reminded it is an exercise encouraging growth and healthy behavior.

Whatever your circumstance take time to assess your own involvements and choices with relationships. Do you always pick a controlling relationship? Or do you always pick a relationship where you are the enabler? Are you respecting your own boundaries while you are in a relationship or are they being sacrificed? Are you always compromising your time and energy to please another? Or are you always compromising your morals or beliefs? Are you maintaining a balance with yourself and other activities? Or are you focusing so much on the other person that you are not taking care of other obligations and priorities?

All of these questions will help you identify the quality of choices you are making when you are choosing relationships. Once you identify your pattern, you can no longer deny an unhealthy relationship. Awareness will make your own behavior and the unhealthy relationship even more difficult to tolerate.

Once you identify your patterns and bring it fourth into awareness, the next process is change. Granted the other party involved will not always agree or like the change that you are going to make, but you have to take action for yourself. In the long run you both will suffer if even one of you is unhappy.

How can we avoid unhealthy relationships? By learning to love and care for ourselves regardless of whether or not someone is in our lives. Once we identify our own needs we can easily work with others feelings without interfering with our own. When we establish a relationship with ourselves, we no longer have to have needy relationships. Instead we can re-teach ourselves to have giving relationships.

Follow your intuition. If something doesn t feel right to you with a relationship then pay attention to those feelings. They are there for a reason. Some people can grow together inside their relationships and some may have to grow apart. The key is to look at ourselves and our relationships in their truest light.

Know that each one of us is entitled to have a loving relationship or friendship. We are worthy of receiving love just as we are worthy of giving it. True partnership fills our cups with abundance, joy, and solidarity, a gift that multiplies within our hearts and our families .

~Heather~

Quote of the Week

"Every day holds the possibility of a miracle."

~ Elizabeth David ~

Welcome to my Newsletter 1/23/08

"Never forget that the first step in getting help is asking for it."
~ Brook ~

We are not Super Woman - she had a cape. Most super-heroes even have sidekicks, Batman has Robin, Super Man can count on Lois Lane, Luke Skywalker has Yoda and Obi-One. I don't know why so many women feel the need to be Super Woman or "do it all on their own." While it might seem that makes us more "independent," or "strong," it doesn't make a lot of sense if you step back a minute and think about it. How many people in this world operate completely independent, capable of doing it all themselves? I can't think of a successful CEO who isn't backed by talented executives. I am unaware of a politician that isn't helped by aides or campaign managers. Schools and churches have boards for guidance. So why do we think that we can, or should, "do it all?"Instead of striving to "do it all" or "beating yourself up" when you can't do it all--switch to a "team spirit" mentality. Find supportive players to be a part of your team and ask for help when you need it. Doing everything ourselves doesn't makes us "stronger," it makes us lonelier and needlessly stressed.

Your Turn:

How have you tried to "do it all" in your life? What were the results? Who can be a part of your support team? Who can you ask for help?

Your affirmation:

Today I let go of trying to "do it all" and focus on building a network of support and encouragement.

Additional note from Helena: "This is a little reminder for me, too!"



Readers share with Readers

A special 'Thank you!' to I.Brennen from Richmond, VA!
She sent me recently an Example Test of the New US Citizenship Test as a little reminder of my wonderful memories of becomeing an US Citizen on December 19th, 2007!

Would you pass the test?

To take a sample test, visit:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21019797/from/ET/



Life Improvement Tips

Are You Afraid To Try Something New?

"When you have come to the edge of all that you know and are about to step off into the darkness, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on, or you will be taught to fly." - Richard Bach

It's pretty normal for all of us to feel hesitant when we want to try something new. The underlying fear of failure is crippling. There are some who even fear getting what they want and finding out that it's not really as great as they dreamed it to be.

The first fear is totally understandable but there are some ways to go about it. Focus on trying something that's simple and realistic first. It can be a new recipe; the new computer software or even the basics of a new language. The object of the game is to learn something to stimulate your senses and if you master it, think of the energy boost you'll get! Slowly, you'll start getting the courage to try something else - it could be another simple thing or a bit more complicated. A few more of these and you'll be confident enough to try whatever goals you want to accomplish.
The second fear can be re-worded as the fear of disappointment and is altogether as real as the fear of failure is. Some unfortunate thing probably happened after you achieved a dream that scared you to try something else. Your psyche associated the terrible outcome - a divorce, a disaster or a death - in the family with the achievement. Or it could be a dozen other different reasons. Whatever it was, you got trapped in the status quo. A psychological counselor can help those who've reached the point that this fear becomes a phobia but to those who can still recognize that they want to change, there's still hope. Again, if there's a will to change however slight it may be, there will be a way to do it. A single baby step toward a new goal is great - nobody expects a power walk at the first try anyway.

Whatever fear you have, challenge yourself to face the obstacles. Problems are always there and so are their solutions.

One thing easy to do that can help a lot is to have some sort of a mantra or an affirmation like: "I want to ____ and I choose to do ____ to achieve this."

It verbalizes your thoughts and helps you focus on the correct way to pull it off. There will be times when you'll encounter some setbacks but take it slow, cut yourself some slack and try again. Eventually, you'll get it.

~ Jeff ~

Career Tips


How To Ask Your Boss for a Raise

Feeling overworked and underpaid? If you're starting to feel like you deserve a raise, here are eight DO's and DON'Ts to build your confidence and tact (and what to avoid!) in asking for the salary you feel you deserve.

DO:

1. Devise a "Plan of Action".

First and foremost, get a strategy together. Make a note of the specific projects you've undertaken and the results you've accomplished. List all of your job skills and the features that make you an asset to this company. Find out what a typical raise is for someone with your experience in your area of occupation. Know the facts and be realistic in your request.

2. Ask for an amount that's slightly higher than one you would be happy with.

If you would be happy with a 5% raise, ask for one a couple of points above it. That way, if your boss starts to negotiate, you won't feel as if your worth has been diluted any by getting less than what you feel you deserve.

3. Remember, your boss shouldn't be the only one negotiating.

If your company is going through a slow period or the economy is down, try to be flexible and know how to respond if your boss suggests a lower amount than what you may have been expecting. Consider other ways of getting a raise too, such as additional vacation time, employee perks or more time off. All of these can be just as good (if not better!) than an actual amount of money.

4. Choose a specific day and time to meet with your supervisor about your raise request.

Avoid choosing a Monday or Friday when bosses are at their busiest. Studies have actually shown that people are more receptive on a Tuesday or Wednesday after lunch. That way, they're not thinking about the weekend or their stomachs while you're getting up the nerve to ask about a raise! If you're afraid of being interrupted during your request, ask to speak to your supervisor for a few minutes after hours.

DON'T:

1. Raise your tone of voice if your boss objects to your raise at first.

Remember, he or she is paying you to do a certain job, and you're asking for more money to do the same job. Be professional and polite at all times, and listen more than demand. Chances are, if your supervisor doesn't award you a raise, they might hint at what else could be done to earn it. If they don't, don't be afraid to ask what steps would be necessary to "prove yourself".

2. Threaten with quitting if you don't get the raise or telling your boss you have another job offer unless you actually do.

He may just call your bluff and let you go!

3. Stumble or beat around the bush with your request.

Be straightforward and confident. You are a valuable member of a team and the supervisor hired you because they obviously thought you were the best qualified. If you have "Thank You" notes from customers or letters from the company praising you for a job well done, bring those to your meeting as well, as they'll help to cement your request and remind your supervisor of your role within the company and its progress.

4. Compare yourself to, or talk negatively about your coworkers or others in a position higher than you.

You may think that this will put you in a positive light when it comes to a promotion or a raise, but to your boss, it shows that if you have a poor attitude toward your colleagues, you'll keep the same poor attitude if you are promoted.

Remember, be confident, professional and tactful. If the boss says "no" or wants to "think about it", open his mind to further consideration by volunteering to do more at the office. Stay an extra hour or help another team on a critical project. This demonstrates that you're willing to "tow the mark" rather than giving your boss the impression of "gimme the money first and THEN I'll work".

Good luck!

~ Jeff ~

Relationships 101

Ideas For Fun Things To Do On A Date

Need an idea for what to do on a date? Here's how to go about finding ideas for new and unusual dates that are enjoyable and memorable.

The three most usual choices for what to do on a date are dinner, a movie, and a public event such as a sports game or concert. Those activities often give the couple several hours of time to enjoy each other's company. But relying on those same activities too often leads to a loss of the sense of drama and importance of the time spent together.

Human nature craves the out-of-the-ordinary. A new experience raises awareness and often contributes greatly to our ability to enjoy ourselves. If a couple continues to occasionally find new and unusual choices for what to do, their time together will be more enjoyable.

Probably the best way to find new ideas for what to do for a date is to make a point of being on the lookout for possibilities. You never know when an idea will present itself. You might see something in the newspaper or in a magazine. Someone you know could share an idea they have had. Your own hobbies and interests might suggest something. Something you did, perhaps years ago, could inspire ideas for a new activity. You might remember some idea you had but never got around to doing.

You should also actively search for new and unusual things to do. A great place to look is web sites about things you are interested in. The local visitors' bureau is a possible source. Look in the community events section of your newspaper. Look through the brochures at the Chamber of Commerce. Look in the yellow pages under headings such as canoes, hiking, and art museums. Check the bulletin board at the library. Use your imagination to adapt what you see at those places to your own interests and tastes.

Keep a list of possible activities. Have a place to keep information such as brochures, maps, and visitors' guides. Set up folders in your computer for storing information you have found online. Use Notepad to copy and paste just what is of interest to you.

Be open to any suggestions and preferences your partner has to offer. Try to be sensitive to his/her tastes and interests. Give almost as much importance to his/her enjoyment of the date as your own enjoyment. After all, you probably won't enjoy the date if your partner doesn't.

Try to choose activities that give enough opportunities for communication. Conversation and comments you and your date make to each other are often the most important part of the date.

Couples who are recent acquaintances need to find out each other's values and interests. Couples who have been together a long time need reassurance and the stimulation of each other's ideas.
Pursue your own interests.

Being passionate about something makes you more interesting. Finally, stay informed to stay interesting.

Keep up with current events and issues. Listen to the news and news commentary programs.

One good source I like is the web sites of National Public Radio.

~Alan~

Quote of the Week

"The world is a great mirror. It reflects back to you what you are. If you are loving, if you are friendly, if you are helpful, the world will prove loving and friendly and helpful to you. The world is what you are."

~ Thomas Dreier ~